Cold Feet and Warm Hearts
by go-sandy
Summary: After four years of friendship, Summer and Ryan have to face the ultimate test. Summer's marriage to Seth. Is it cold feet, or does her heart belong to someone else? [One Shot]


"_Do you Summer Roberts take Seth Cohen to be your husband – to live together after God's ordinance – in the holy estate of matrimony? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health, for richer, for poorer, for better, for worse, in sadness and in joy, to cherish and continually bestow upon him your heart's deepest devotion, forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto him as long as you both shall live?"_

On the beach, in her wedding dress, crying – that's where Summer is. She knows it's only a matter of minutes before they come looking for her, asking her questions, wondering why she ran out. She also knows that she wouldn't be able to answer them, just like she wasn't able to say a single word at the altar.

She can picture Seth, a million thoughts racing through his mind, trying to babble his way through things. And Marissa, calling her cell phone, her heart beating fast. Too bad Summer's cell phone is off.

But every time she tries to picture Ryan, she's overpowered by those _signs_ and memories that got her here today.

"_Okay, now that we escaped the disastrous parent-paparazzi of graduation, you can tell me what's up," Summer stated, reclining on the hood of Ryan's car._

_Ryan followed suit, lying down on the car. Summer turned to face him, and he looked into her eyes, the sun's light reflecting off of them. He wanted to lean in, kiss her, make her close those amazing eyes, but he stopped himself. He had to wait, atleast until she heard what he had to say._

"_We've been best friends for…" he began._

"_4 years," Summer continued proudly._

"_Yeah. Four long years. And we know eachother inside out."_

_Summer nodded._

"_I was thinking…"_

_Summer looked at him, linking her hand with his for reassurance. "Yeah?"_

_Just as his lips parted to speak, another voice chimed in._

"_There you are," Seth said, clapping his hands together. "I was looking for you, Summer. I was wondering if we could talk."_

_Summer sighed, her eyes squinting away from the sun and straining to look at Seth. "Cohen, Ryan's trying to tell me something."_

_Ryan sat up, removing his hand from hers. "It's all right. It can wait." He looked over at Summer. "Call me when you're done." He hopped off the car._

_Seth patted his back, and added, "Thanks man."_

_Ryan returned to the busy graduation ceremony. Upon seeing him, Kirsten began crying – again. He sighed and walked forward, preparing himself for another batch of death-grip hugs._

_After smiling for a few cameras and hugging everyone he crossed paths with, he was able to get away to answer his ringing phone. "Hello?"_

_He heard Summer's ragged breaths on the other end of the phone, but she didn't say a word. He read through her silence – he knew something went wrong._

"_What is it?" _

"_Seth…" she stammered._

_Ryan drew in a deep breath. "Yeah?"_

"_He proposed."_

If only she'd said no. If only this hadn't started in the first place, she wouldn't be here right now, crying at the memory.

But how was she to know she was doing the wrong thing? After all, Marissa was in Paris for her modeling gig and unavailable for advice.

And Ryan...

_She felt him walking up behind her, because the sound of his shoes against the sand was getting louder and louder, until he stopped. His shadow towered over her as the waves crashed against her graduation gown. _

_She swore she wouldn't cry that day, but as soon as he sat next to her and his arm wrapped around her body, it wasn't her choice anymore. The tears were flooding down her cheeks silently, but each tear yelled a thousand words that rung through Ryan's ears and pierced right into his heart._

_He whispered sweet nothings to her, wanting the haunting tears to go away, but it only got worse when they turned into sobs._

"_I don't know what to do," she wept into Ryan's chest, her body falling further and further into his lap with each loud sob that sent tremors down her body._

_He kept stroking her back, calming her down, and she continued crying into his shirt until her eyes were too weary to moisten. She remained in his embrace, an occasional sob vibrating her body, and when she was completely still, her helpless eyes traveled up to Ryan's._

"_Please," she whispered. "Tell me what to do, Ryan."_

_He was powerless to her eyes, and they both knew exactly what they wanted him to say._

_But as he parted his lips, he felt his mind pull back the words and replace them with a million heavy stones. He knew what he wanted was impossible, and that allowing Seth to have Summer once and for all was the easy way out of his fantasies._

_Summer saw his eyes harden, and his features were no longer soft, and she feared what would come out of his lips next._

"_Marry him."_

A number of roaring motors follow her to the beach, and she no longer feels warm and safe.

The beach no longer feels like home. She feels like an unwanted stranger, ripped away from a welcoming embrace.

The waves no longer sound serene and calm, instead they sound vicious, as though they are ready to engulf her into the merciless ocean.

The sun isn't bright anymore – it's fading under a blur of black clouds, sending chills through her body. And soon the weather isn't fair anymore – roars of thunder deafen her ears and she finds that her tears are getting lost in the drenching rain.

Behind the rain, she sees Ryan, signaling Seth to stay in the car. Seth hesitates, but within seconds he's locked in the car, staring at her from behind the windshields.

Ryan runs over to her. "What're you doing?" he yells, taking off his jacket. He holds it over her head, protecting her from the cloudburst.

"I can't marry him! I know you told me to, but I can't!"

"Why?"

"That day," she cries out. "That day when you came to talk to me! Graduation!"

Ryan narrows his eyes at her, trying to see her through the rain.

"What were you going to say?" she shouts.

"Summer – it doesn't matter!"

"Four years, Ryan! That's how long I've been away from Seth, from Marissa! That's how long I had _nothing_ but you!"

"Summer! Seth came back from New York for you! What are you doing?"

"He came back after the long, hard years of college! The years that I needed him the most! And guess what? _You were there!_" She paused, grasping onto his arm. "I've changed. Because of you, Ryan! You're the only person who knows who I am now! I need you. I need you to understand me and explain me to me the world! I need you to see me and show me to myself! I need you to love me, or else I'm going to live a world of hate, Ryan!"

Ryan stares down into her eyes, and despite the beads of rain covering their bodies, he can discern her tears even if he's a mile away.

She shakes her head. "We've been best friends for four, long years, and I know you inside out…" Her lips slowly begin to take the form of a smile. "I was thinking..."

She cups his face in her palms, and for the first time since Seth proposed, her heart was beating normally. Even though her eyes could look into Ryan's forever, she squeezes them shut, leans up, and kisses him with all the passion they've been repressing since the day she said, _"Chino? Ew."_

"I was thinking," she begins. "Maybe…"

"Maybe I love you," he continues, a smirk on his face, leaning in to kiss her again.

When the kiss breaks, they're both in tears, and Summer points at the empty area where Seth's car _was_.

"He's not here," Ryan says, looking back at Summer. "It's just you and me."

Summer smiles, planting a kiss on his lips. "Just like it used to be."


End file.
